I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
and that's how I found out my dad doesn't believe in towels... holiday magic.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I was like a migrating bird last night. Navigating on pure instinct. Don't remember how... but I made it home.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
guys I just made $20 cause these random south african guys thought I wasn't wearing any underwear
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Why is there a business card for people who need bail bonds in my wallet...
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