1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
just weighed my balls on my pocket scale. that high.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
Getting high magically turns headaches into rainbows.
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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