Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
You did a cartwheel, it was terrible.
I remember that cartwheel, it was okay.
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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