And if you don't call me, I will embarrass you publicly with a can of spray cheez.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
mother daughter bonding time. she's helping me make jello shots.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
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