If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
What's the second line of that rhyme that starts "Vicodin before scotch...?"
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
idk but i have you stored in my phone as 'guy with beard doing body shots'
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
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