that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
you had me at cake vodka
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
my nose is crying tears of wow.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
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