is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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