my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
You gave me the wrong number last night so I texted someone else something I definitely shouldn't have.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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