Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
Forgot to tell you--the bartender at Crowbar set his arm on fire last night. He was doing this "Cocktail" bartender trick of pouring alcohol that was on fire between glasses. Then some leaked out, onto his arm, and set his arm on fire, then his shirt. Exciting! (And he's ok).
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
WHAT THE FUCK I JUST PULLED TWO TAMPONS OUT OF MY VAGINA. WHERE DID THE OTHER ONE COME FROM??
....surprise!
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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