I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
We made the pizza boy do Jell-o shots with us. He didn't even deliver to our house, we just called him over from the neighbors
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I just blew my weed a kiss
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Randomize
