:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
Bitch looked at my dick and said "I thought they called you horsecock, I'm already disappointed"
I told you that line would get her home never said it was a good idea
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Randomize