what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
so i replaced his speed with my ped egg shaveings
dont u have athletes foot?
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
After owing so much in back child support they should make vasectomy a mandatory
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
I'm adopting to save the world from the moral outrage that would be my offspring
We're snowed in with only two condoms. This will literally be valentines day russian roullette.
Last night someone asked you what your favorite color was and you said "bagel."
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Acid king. Jackson puked a lot. Promoter booth. Angry security. No acid. Probably a good thing.
Randomize
