I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I woke up after 12 hours of being wildly intoxicated, got jizz on my face, and woke up in a different bed than I passed out in. My makeup is still perfect. I'm writing Revlon a thank you note.
They had some plan b on the table between the beer and the guacamole. Yeah, it's gonna be a fun party.
She texted her brother about how much she loved his hot tub. He responded three days later that he wasn't aware he owned a hot tub.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
An don't say it's "personal preference" cause I don't buy it. I just want to have normal cool guy balls. I don't want to be the dude that's still rocking the equivalent of the "mid 90's bowl cut" of scrotum haircuts.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
Randomize
