I want to stick my p in your. b.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
my mom asked me how i could steal on a clear conscious and i told her it was because when i was younger she let me watch alladin and he did it.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
That's what my new years consisted of. Consoling heartbroken girls and having people throw up in my hands.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
My ass is underappreciated
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize
