I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
Got a plan. Ill do rock paper scissors and if you win we smoke a joint. Throw rock.
is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
Randomize
