I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
What if our hands were octopus tentacles?
You're an idiot.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
How do I know if porn I have watched is haunted?
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
Randomize
