We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
his face was nice enough, but his choice of footwear screamed columbian drug lord
Welcome to stoned Saturday. Full of laser tag and beyonce and awesome
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
sometimes you just gotta rip off the nipple tape and get it done.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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