are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
drunk me is my new role model. he's fearless. like not even afraid of tornadoes.
as soon as I walked into work this morning, my boss called me out on my hangover, patted me on the back and said I'm getting time an a half for even showing up. Did I really look that bad this morning?
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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