dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
so I woke up this morning and on their fridge, the first item on the shopping list was my virginity.
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Fell down a spiral staircase. Et tu vodka. Et tu.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
Right... Let's keep my vodka tinged mind focused on simple words
That's actually a fantastic idea... The kinky sex dungeon will be vastly improved by the addition of a lightsaber
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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