He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
So I heard you only slept with me because you were drunk...is that true?
That depends on who this is.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Randomize
