I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
Another one? Damn, how many David's is that?
six.
Oh, I thought it was higher.
No, that would be the Matt's
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
Thank you for not boning my boss.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
Randomize
