no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
i just used your hair clip to unclog my bong. i miss you so much!
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