You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
Do you need a place to sleep? Cause I fucked in the guestroom a few weeks ago and never washed the sheets. But if you don't care neither do I.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
Next time when I try to seductively eat onion rings while drunk remind me of tonight.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
You cried for a while then lifted lots of weights then cady's ex put glitter on your tits and then you took a nap. I got you pizza and brought you home. Nothing too exciting.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Don’t say some truly stupid shit like that to me. In a kitchen. Where the knives are kept
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