Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
of course. lets lasso hookers.
I talked a bachelorette party out of a 4 person bucket of long islands, and drank it by myself. Please call me a taxi. The fat brides maid just grabbed my cock
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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