...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I just want nice things and good sex
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Also- should we send out holiday cards? That say, "Eat a dick, 2014"?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
Randomize
