I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
seriously this is one of those moments where im glad i dont really talk to or know the people i sleep with
Well said.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
It's 11am on 4/20 and I'm already in urgent care.
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
He sent me a dick pic for every page I had to write for final papers (87) & brought me adderall. Tell me that isn't romance.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize