i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize
