I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
I don't think I can fit "I'm sorry for ruining Christmas" on one cake. Better make two.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize
