im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
The best part about the NBA starting up is I get to see Charles Barkley make a fool out of himself for 8 months
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
