A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
How was your sisters wedding?
Oh, I didn't go. I slept through my alarm. I finally woke up and was like...I don't think so.
sisterhood ftl.
I'm so high I used the top vent on my dashboard to heat up a cheeseburger
woman puking in liquor store parking lot at 9:30 on a tuesday morning = best commute ever.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Honest to god.. She looks better fat. I never would have imagined those words coming out of my mouth, EVER.
I'm drunk, we're losing, and I'm in the visitors stands. This is about to get ugly.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
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