so i stopped by cvs on the way home this morning, turns out hallmark doesnt make an im sorry my friend puked on your friend card, call me if were still speaking
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Randomize
