Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i walked into his room and he was eskimo kissing his weed..
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
You were so excited to be getting 4 tickets to the Whale Rodeo.... That high
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
He understood my need for pizza was more important than my need for sex. He's the one.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Are you alone?
No, but I have to leave him in my bed while I go on this date.
where are my eyebrows?
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Randomize
