K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
what happened last night?
u kept telling him to fuck u optimus prime style
that explains why his roommate kept saying autobots roll out this morning as i left
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
Thanks be to the Goddess of Whores!! I straightened my bed before Ken got here. Found Calvin's boxers in the sheets!!!!
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
Randomize
