So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I woke up this morning at 8 to my roommates still drunk, hanging out on the roof, and screaming at bikers. They couldn't figure out why they were into it.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
She said, I've heard about you, from girls you wouldn't even be interested in. What?
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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