my phone cant type all the emotion im having
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
This baby is an asshole
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
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