you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
While leaving the bar with another guy I told the bouncer I was sad his friend had a fiancee
You were drinking Everclear weren't you?
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Randomize
