He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
dude i just heard a girl tell another girl 'what part of im trying to get laid tonight dont u understand?'
needless to say i wont be back home tonight
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
I threw a jar of pickles out the window at a police car, why was that not a good enough reason to put me to bed?
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
In an unknown location. With a giant marshmallow stuck to my back. Hello breakfast.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
Randomize
