okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
and that's when the elephants and penises started dancing on the ceiling
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Drink. Fuck. Waffle House. Repeat.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Randomize
