i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i stuck my finger in my ass and it felt weird. but you know. it should be different when a guy does it right?
She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
Omg yes! I just found a random muffin! Don't question it. Just praise the miracle.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
my one night stand just gave me money "to buy a better vibrator" tis the season
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
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