Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Can I borrow you for, like, thirty minutes so you can lay on one boob and rub the other until I fall asleep?
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
