Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
Pretty sure I just slept with Elmo.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
She asked the woman in the drive through to cover everything she ordered in mayonnaise, including here chilli cheese fries. Didn't happen. Then she started swerving at the car next to us screaming, asking if they had mayonnaise.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
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