i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he was walking around the bar drinking wild turkey and gobbling simultaneously
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
At some point the phrase "I've hit rock bottom" stopped having a meaning and became my general state of life
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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