She kept saying "I didn't do it" but she was so drunk she forgot her pee was orange from her UTI medicine.
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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