Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Did you hallucinate the same white buffalo that I did last night.
No, but I did see you shaking hands with a homeless man.
There was this creepy guy on the bus. So I puffed out my stomach & began so hold my stomach like I was preggers.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Randomize
