How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I shit myself when I came, don't have flu sex
He wants to pour butter pecan flavored coffee creamer on me and lick it off. I'm like, dude, gross. French Vanilla ok? Ugh.
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize