maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
Spent $1500 on bottle service and have a lump on my head from hitting the nightstand while puking. Excess? Nooo Success.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Drank vodka clubs for 6 hours last night. Holy shit just realized that.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
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