I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
The liquor stores are closed! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! CURSE YOU SANDY!!!!
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
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