I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Whatever. That's why I am to be babied like a calf. I regret nothing.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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