She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Every time she shows up on my newsfeed, I get the taste of tequila in my mouth.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Romney sounds like a middle school girl and that creepy ass smile makes me want to close my blinds
We had half a pitcher of beer left and he asked us if we wanted a to-go cup. Fuck yeah we want it to-go.
The whorange rubbed off. His white shirt was so gross at the end of the night I told him to frame it.
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
Randomize
