I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
We just licked a sour creme and onion chip for salt for a tequila shot. Our vacation has officially begun.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Sorry, all I could picture was you jamming your dick into a lemon.
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
Me sprinting out of your house without my bra or shoes is our entire relationship defined in a single moment.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
